Honor – What a Concept!

 

Honor and respect: two words that have fallen out of fashion in our modern world. And yet, this is a concept that is commanded by God in order for our families to function as God intended.

 

Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you.”

Ephesians 6:2, 3 “Honor your Father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.”

Ephesians 5:33 “Nevertheless let each individual among you also love his own wife even as himself; and let the wife see to it that she respect her husband.”

Honor and respect to our parents and as wives toward our husbands.  I rarely hear this happening.  Most of the time I hear kids being sassy and rude and disobedient to their kids and wives complaining about what a jerk their husband is.

 

One thing I’ve noticed is that, as the mom and the wife, I set the tone in our house.  If I start to get less than respectful in my attitude and tone of voice with Nathan, the kids pick up on that instantly start to get a little disrespectful toward him too.  I strive to be respectful and honoring toward the wonderful man God has given me and to encourage my children to honor this fantastic dad God placed in their lives.

 

Yesterday was Nathan’s birthday and on his birthday he flew early in the morning to Indianapolis to pick up our new mini-van and spent the entire day driving it home.  This may seem like a strange thing to do, but he desires to manage our finances wisely and one of the things we don’t do is go in debt for a car.  We were able to find a van within our means and it just happened to be in Indiana. So, Nathan sacrificed his time and his birthday to go get it and bring it home.

 

When I left for dance last night the kids were all working mysteriously in the basement.  When I came home, this is what I found:

 

Wow, I was blown away!  I asked them what this was all for!?  Well, they answered, Dad would be getting home after they were in bed and they wanted him to know they loved him and wanted to wish him a Happy Birthday.  I especially love the birthday sign that says at the bottom “Dad Rocks.” Talk about honoring your father.  OK, maybe that’s in more 21st Century lingo, but I can tell you when Nathan walked in at 9:30 after having been awake since 3 a.m., he felt loved and honored.

 

Honoring your father and mother is the first commandment with a promise, the Bible says.  A promise!  What’s that promise?  That it will be well with you and that you may live long on this earth.  Try honor, try respect.  Sure beats bitterness, wrath and anger!  What a concept!

Trying to Make Sense of it All

The past week has been one of the most emotional and trying weeks this year.  My head is still spinning, my emotions are in turmoil and I admit I am confused as to the direction God is taking my life.

 

We have been doing foster care for two years and recently we took care of a 1 year old boy.  This particular assignment was especially difficult and took extra grace and patience, as this little one was extremely unhappy.  In fact, pretty much the entire time he was in our home, he cried, yelled, screamed, threw a fit, you name it.  Nothing I could do would soothe him.  It got on all of our nerves.  We tried to do school over his screams.  Eventually, I’d have to give him toys, put him in his playpen and shut the door just so my kids could concentrate.  In the evening, I’d feed him, diaper him, play with him and then put in earplugs to do my work just so I wouldn’t have to listen to his screams as he just walked around crying for no apparent reason.  We all gave him as much love and affection as he would allow us to, but basically he was just a very unhappy little guy.  The exception to this was on the week-ends when his grandma would come to pick him up.  His whole countenance would change, he would light up and lunge into her arms.  It was evident to all that he belonged in her home.  Thankfully, the system worked quickly and he went home to live with her two weeks ago.

 

Last Sunday we received the devastating news that he died unexpectedly in his sleep.  There was no explanation for his death, no wrongdoing, no one was to blame, it just happened.

 

I admit, I have had a terrible week.  I can’t even imagine how awful the week has been for his grandma and mom.  But for me, I was assailed with unproductive guilt.  Did I miss something obvious?  Did I do something I didn’t realize?  Was I somehow, even in some small way to blame?  All of this, I knew, was from the Enemy, but I struggled to fight against these thoughts.  At the same time I had an overwhelming fear for my own children.  That somehow I would be blamed and my children would be taken away.  I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep.  I prayed desperately, confessing my irrational, sinful thoughts, my anxiety and turning it over to God every night.

 

His funeral was on Saturday and it was an amazing picture of God’s grace and mercy.  It was the closure that our whole family needed. Daniel, especially, has been having a difficult time dealing with his death.  The Men’s Choir from Teen Challenge, a faith-based rehab program, was there to sing and to share their hope and faith in Jesus Christ and how faith in Christ set them free from addiction and bondage and guilt.  The pastor, too, shared an amazing message of freedom and grace.  We learned that the baby’s mother, just the day before the funeral, accepted that message and put her faith and trust in Jesus Christ for salvation.  We were able to speak with her and encourage her and the baby’s grandma.

 

We often pray for the moms’ of the babies we care for, but hardly ever see any results.  We very rarely are privileged to follow up with them. So, to be able to know that some good came out of this tragedy as a result of the prayers of many, was so comforting. 

 

Romans 8:28 promises “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”

It’s pretty amazing to know that this baby’s mom was one of those that God has called according to His purpose and that He can use even the death of a little baby for good.   His name was glorified on Saturday.

 

In spite of all of this, I have to admit, I’m still trying to make sense of it all.  No, I don’t have to know why.  I don’t doubt that God is good.  It’s just, I’m wondering what is my part in all of this now.  We had another close call with a foster baby this summer.  A little preemie we were caring for stopped breathing, we rushed her to the hospital and by God’s grace, she was cared for by the ER staff and lived.  But, she still spent a week in the hospital and has so many challenges in front of her.  I don’t want to live according to my feelings and I want to do the will of God. But, I’m also wondering if it’s time for the drama to end.  I’m just trying to figure out, what in the world is God doing in my life here.  I don’t want to get it wrong.  I’m tired.  I’m emotional.  But, I’m also scared to disobey God.

 

Today I heard Chip Ingram remind us that God always fulfills His promises.  And he reminded us of one in James.  With an open heart, but with some fear and trembling too, I’m asking,

 

James 1:5 “But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all men generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”

I need wisdom right now and if I ask, God’s Word promises to give generously.

 

“Give me a revelation, I don’t what to do. Cuz I’ve been trying to find my way, I haven’t got a clue.  Tell me should I stay here, or do I need to move?  Give me a revelation, I got nothing without You, I got nothing without You.” – Third Day, Revelation

Ski Swap Rocks!!!!-Laura

Well all summer I have been working for a guy that lives really close by our house. I let out his dogs everyday when he is at work. I have been saving that money for a long time so I could by my ski things! So My mom and I went to the ski swap and I got a really nice deal on my race skis. i got them for $125. That is really good since they are $400 skis!! Then I need a ski suit for racing and I got a ski suit for $75. That is also a good deal since most suits are $300. I also got zip off pants. So when I am about to race I can zip off the snow pants and voila I do not even have to

take off my skis. They are super nice snow pants!! Now i am just waiting for the snow!!

My Rock’n New Bike-Daniel

I love the springs on my bike. I can do jumps easier with the springs. I also like how I can brake with the pedals and the handle brakes. My bike is blue and silver. And it goes way faster than Nate’s bike. I am so glad I turned 7 and got a new bike. I am happy that my bike has new fancy wheel. That is all for now.

Suppertime!!

At our house there has always been a strong rule that unless you are sick or have a good reason to be gone you have to be at the table for supper. So at the end of a day no matter how tired we are or how long dad had to work we always sit down as a family and enjoy time together. Well as I started to grow up I started going to peoples’ houses for sleepovers and things like that. And all of a sudden I realized that supper was more than just a time to eat, but a time to savor. When I went to one friend’s house when I was about ten years old the mom had to go get something from her sister’s house. So the dad threw a pizza in the oven and then went to the “family room” to watch some news or football game. When the pizza was ready my friend’s brothers went and ate on the floor in the family room and my friend and I sat at the table to eat with her youngest brother that was about 4 or 5 and still needed help. Well right after supper the little boys wanted to watch a movie so we went and watched a movie with them. When the movie was over I watched this friend go pick up her sleeping brother and tuck him into bed. It broke my heart to see the sister who baby sat the brothers quite often, have to tuck her brother into bed instead of her parents.  

So I just wanted to thank my parents so much for spending a lot of time with us. And I am thankful for my brothers.I love my family very much!

How to Get a Snuggle

Everyone knows boys and girls are different.  I am blessed to watch these differences up close as I am the mom of both a daughter and two sons.  As my youngest son, Daniel, begins to grow bigger I’ve noticed a change in him.  He’s no long such a Mommy’s boy.  I say this with a little sniffle.  It’s harder to stop him for a hug, a snuggle and a kiss.  I asked him for a kiss on my cheek the other day which he gladly gave me, then I asked for a kiss on my lips and he promptly responded, “Ewww, gross Mom, not on your lips!”  Daniel is usually moving about 100 miles an hour all day long. 

 

BUT!  I’ve discovered something.  If I sit down quietly on the couch with a book; one of mine or one to read to him and I act like I don’t care if I get a hug or not, something extraordinary happens!  Daniel snuggles up next to me.  He rubs his face against my shoulder and wraps his arms around me and gets closer and closer until he’s completely invading my personal space. . .And I love it!

Faith or Fear

Lately I’ve been wrestling with something I think a lot of moms wrestle with.  Through some really difficult circumstances that our family is facing I am realizing that I don’t necessarily trust God as readily as I should with my children and my childrens’ lives and futures.  Theoretically, in my head, I know that God loves my children even more than I do and that I’m supposed to hold them with an open hand, but when the rubber meets the road I find myself getting anxious to the point of not eating and not sleeping.  I’ve found through different circumstances of life that I can handle just about anything that’s thrown my way, but I have refused to think about anything happening to my children.  Lately through some stuff that’s been happening around here, I’m being forced to think about my faith, or lack of it.

I’m always amazed by the faith of Christians in other countries whose stand for Christ puts not only themselves in harms way, but their kids as well.  I’m not really afraid for myself, I’m willing to put it all on the line as far as my own life goes, but when it comes to sacrificing my kids well-being, health and safety, that’s it. Nope, sorry God, I’m gonna hang on tightly to these guys, you can’t have ‘em.  Now that I realize I have this attitude, it’s not a very encouraging thought to me.  I mean, where is the balance in taking care of your kids and letting go of them?  Where does faith replace fear? 

I know I’m nowhere near where I need to be yet.  I know in my head that God loves them more than I do, but I need to transfer that knowledge to my heart and truly, truly trust my children to His care.  Then I need to step out in obedience to whatever He asks me to do without question.

If this is how I feel about my kids, how much more the God of the Universe who created them and longs to gather them under His wings.  Sigh.  I’m still growing, still learning.

SuperMom to the Rescue!

Today my wonderful super mom went to the store even though it is super rainy and cold and wet. She is so amazing to be able to go to the store and buy us food to eat and a big pumkin that we have been begging for.
She even got us some poptarts! Now you can not tell me that is not a supermom!

Proverbs 31:15 "She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar.

Then this morning she sat down and taught Daniel school. Well it was kind of hard for her to teach him today because the princple (dad) was being very distracting to Daniel. And she just told him to quit it or she would have to teach him acouple lessons. Now for a teacher to put up through I know she is a supermom.
So I am so thankful God has given me a wonderful supermom!

Building a plane and boat - by Nate

Me and my dad are building a plane and a boat. I am building the boat,and my dad is building the plane.
The plane is almost done. But the boat is not.  The plane is made out of balsa wood and my boat is made from another kind of wood, but not balsa wood!  I am making a Sharp Schooner.  It will be about a foot long, but will not float, it's just a model.  It will have sails.  Dad's plane is MUCH bigger. It's a Piper Cub J-3.  It's 3 feet and wingspan is about 5 feet long. Dad got a different plane today to practice flying so he doesn't crash his Piper Cub.  I like working on wood projects with my Dad.  I want to do it again and again and again!







                                                                                                        BY NATE.

Humbling Myself

Like last year we are being homeschooled once again. And also like last year I struggle with doing school with my brothers. I love being homeschooled but, there are just some days when I just feel like putting duct tape over there mouths. But then I think what am I doing to irritate them that is causing them to drive me insane. When I think about it that way I realize that I am not treating them in a way I would like to be treated. In doing that they just copy me.

Well then I started thinking about it a little more and thought what would happen if I treated them how I would treat one of my friends or a relative. Then maybe they would follow after my lead. And if they did follow after my lead than we would argue less and would treat each other more kindly. I know we are not perfect so even when we fight we should be able to forgive and forget.
Laura

What I'm Missing

This week-end is the big, annual show for my belly dance troupe and once again I'm not in it.  I'm sure this confuses and probably annoys my teacher, Eman.  All the girls I dance with get very excited and work very hard in the month leading up to the show. They learn and perfect the 3 or 4 dances they are in and it's a little awkward for me, since I'm one of the few girls not in the show.  The other few girls not participating are usually doing so because it's too expensive.  I've explained my stance a few times, but most just say, "Oh, it must be because she's a Pastor's wife, too bad." 

Belly dancing is a beautiful, ancient art, but also a beautiful, very seductive form of dance.  As my dad once said, "I don't think the Shulamite woman was doing the Hokey Pokey for Solomon!"  The only place I practice my "art" is in the studio with the other women I dance with. I have fun, get some exercise and that's it.  This begs the question, why?  Is it because I'm a "pastor's wife?"  Or is there something more?

Ephesians 5:3 "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people."

Wow, not even a hint of immorality or impurity, not just for pastor's or their wives, but any of God's people.

Hebrews 13:4 "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral."

As a Christian and a married woman my allegiance belongs first to Christ and then to my husband.  My body is a temple of the living God.  I am not free to flaunt it seductively before other men.  I am commanded to dress modestly and treat other men as brothers.  I honor my marriage by being sexually pure and that doesn't mean just by being physically faithful to my husband.  That also means keeping my body only for him.  No other man is given the opportunity to look lustfully at my body dancing!  Even if I were not married, I would still be obligated by God to honor him by keeping my body pure and helping my brothers to not sin by looking lustfully at a woman.

So, I continue to enjoy my dancing behind the closed doors of my home and with the comraderie of the other girls in the dance studio.  I'm "missing" the big show, but I'm really not missing much of anything.  I've gained God's approval which is worth more to me than the approval of man, and the love and respect of my husband.

Grateful

Today was one of the most exhausting days I've had lately.  I've been in the process of redoing my bathroom.  Unfortunately all that's been in my head are lovely visions of new towels and shower curtains. And some new paint on the walls. But in the last two days I've had to get down to the nitty, gritty of scraping wallpaper off of the bathroom walls.  It's not a big bathroom, but, oh man, what a job. As I've scraped, I've discovered interesting things.  Like, another layer of wallpaper, lime green paint, sheetrock mud over the first layer of wallpaper. It's been a HUGE job.  My mother-in-love has been here this week-end and she has helped me scrape.  I don't know too many people who would be willing to do what she has done this week-end. She's inhaled the nasty fumes of wallpaper remover, which finally gave me a horrible migraine. She has killed her body and neck scraping wallpaper and glue from high on the ceiling and down low behind the toilet. Ugh.  I am immensely grateful to her for helping with with an insurmountable project.  I know it's going to look great eventually. Right now I think I'll go to bed, maybe have a good cry. :) But, the wallpaper is pretty much gone and now I have to figure out what comes next.  Thank you sooooo much Mom! You're the greatest!

What I (Daniel) am Learning

I am very glad my mom is my teacher. I am leaning to add. And I can count to 100 all be myself. Mom is teaching me how to tell left from right. I am learning all about shapes and patterns in my math. I am also learning how to write the date on my special calender. That is what I am learning about in math.

In phonics I am learning how to read. And I can read two books. I can write my name all by myself.I can write really good too. I color pictures of my stories.And I cut out lots of pictures. I like to cut out pictures from magazines. My favorite thing to do in phonics is writing.Well that is what I am learning in school.

Atmospheric Pressure Science Lesson.

Well all this week and last week I have been learning about the atmosphere around us. It is all a bit confusing at times. Well almost all the time until I study it more. But I would like to tell you about atmospheric pressure.

Last week I did an experiment with two emty pop cans. I filled the pop cans with a little bit of water. (Until the bottom of the can was coverd) Next I put the can on a little frying pan and let the water boil. Once the water was boiling I let it boil for acouple of minutes. When I let it boil for a little bit it got most of the air out. Then I had two bowls full of ice water. Using a pair of tongs I put one of the cans in upright and one of the cans in upside down. The first one just floated around and the second one popped! (It scared my mom and I) The reason the firt can floated was because,when it got put in upright it filled with air pushing against all the atmospheric pressure around the outside of it. The second can on the other hand was crumpled because, it got put in upside down in the ice water which made it did not fill with air. So the atmospheris pressure pushed on the can from the outside which made that can crumple because there was no air inside the can to push against the pressure outside the can.

That is all for now. Maybe next time I can tell you all about the atmosphere. (or maybe you would like to know about some algeabre!)

Girls and Hormones

Eph. 4:32 "And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you."

Today's been one of those days, one of those, girls and hormone days. And there's two girls living here, so it's been a not-so-fun day. A day to practice patience, tender-heartedness and forgiveness. I admit I've made faces and strangling motions behind my daughter's back today. My boys have steered clear, probably of both of us! Laura's even been frustrated because the computer is just too darn slow for her today! We had to re-start the computer because she was so impatient with it, she got it all locked up.

A family gives us many opportunities to practice patience and forgiveness. We are often on our worst behavior with our families. But, I believe that we are to be our most loving selves with our families, the ones we truly love best in the world.

So, today I'm gonna choose to love the little darlin', hormones and all. After all, they're often very patient with me in my, not-so-nice times, too. And God is ALWAYS patient and slow to anger, abounding in love to me when I least deserve it.