Day Forty-seven – Little Red Christmas Shoe

Head’s up shoe lovers!!! Molly’s shoe blog continues!!! It’s time to roll out the winter collection! Starting with this perfect, little gem of a shoe that my husband, no less, brought me home last week for my Christmas tree:

Setting up the Christmas tree has always been a beloved ritual, usually the week-end after Thanksgiving. Some people shop on Black Friday, but not me. I love to cozy up in my house with Christmas music, leftovers, and hot chocolate and pull out the Christmas decorations. Nathan knew he was in for it this morning when I uttered the “T” word.

“Get the tree,” I exclaimed!

This year we decided that Nathan and I would set up the tree and the kids would do all the lights and decorations. We agreed that if it was less than perfect that was ok. If our friends come to our house at Christmas for the perfect decorations, the cleanliness and the food, they’re not true friends. Hopefully, they’re coming to see US! So, please, come visit, anytime, but as the old saying goes, “If you’re coming to see my house, make an appointment! But, if you’re coming to see me, come on in!”

My tree is an eclectic collection of ornaments. Growing up, my mom got my sister and I a new ornament every year, and I have carried on that tradition with my children. Most years our ornaments have something to do with our personalities or the previous year’s activities. My least favorite ornament is a brass guitar with the words “Amazing Grace” on it. That was a reminder of the year I was learning to play guitar. The very first solo I ever played in church was “Amazing Grace”. I was not very good, and my guitar was out of tune. I guess that ornament reminds me to stay humble when I hang it on the tree every year, but I’m glad I’ve improved since then! Last year I bought the kids skiing and snowboarder ornaments.

So, it meant a lot to me that Nathan #1 bought me an ornament and #2 bought me a little shoe. He teases me enough about my extensive shoe collection, and he’s the one who has to live with it. If you haven’t noticed we’re on day 47 and we doubled up a few days. I checked back. So far, I’ve written about 50 pairs of shoes. Yes, that’s right. Half a hundred pairs of shoes, and we still have most of my winter shoes to go. So, yeah, Nathan puts up with a lot. For instance, my side of the closet is all shoes.

All. Shoes.

My clothes are in the guest room.

Hello. My name is Molly and I’m a shoeaholic. I don’t expect to reform anytime soon. Sorry.

It was with great pride I put my sparkly red shoe on the tree.

Front and center.

What Thanksgiving Really Means

On October 3, 1863 President Abraham Lincoln issued the following proclamation, setting up the Thanksgiving we currently celebrate. The words are profound.

By the President of the United States of America.

A Proclamation.

The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God. In the midst of a civil war of unequaled magnitude and severity, which has sometimes seemed to foreign States to invite and to provoke their aggression, peace has been preserved with all nations, order has been maintained, the laws have been respected and obeyed, and harmony has prevailed everywhere except in the theatre of military conflict; while that theatre has been greatly contracted by the advancing armies and navies of the Union. Needful diversions of wealth and of strength from the fields of peaceful industry to the national defence, have not arrested the plough, the shuttle or the ship; the axe has enlarged the borders of our settlements, and the mines, as well of iron and coal as of the precious metals, have yielded even more abundantly than heretofore. Population has steadily increased, notwithstanding the waste that has been made in the camp, the siege and the battle-field; and the country, rejoicing in the consiousness of augmented strength and vigor, is permitted to expect continuance of years with large increase of freedom. No human counsel hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the Most High God, who, while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy. It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and one voice by the whole American People. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to His tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquility and Union.

In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand and caused the Seal of the United States to be affixed.

Done at the City of Washington, this Third day of October, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and sixty-three, and of the Independence of the Unites States the Eighty-eighth.

By the President: Abraham Lincoln

Considering the fact that we are again at war, and that many of us forget to honor God in our celebrations of Thanksgiving and Christmas, I find President Lincoln’s proclamation especially relevant for our modern times. What goes around, comes around and there is nothing new under the sun. He asks us to remember to do “humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience.”

II Chronicles 7:14, “and My people ^who are called by My name humble themselves and pray, and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”

In the proclamation Lincoln asks us also to “commend to His tender care all who have become widows and orphans.” God asks no less of His children.

“This is pure and undefiled religion ^in the sight of our God and Father, to ^visit ^orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained ^by ^the world.” James 1:27

And of course, he asks us to remember to direct our thankfulness to God to whom every gracious gift is due. It really does us little good to be thankful for the blessings in our lives, if we are unaware and uncaring that it is our merciful heavenly Father who lovingly pours out these blessings on those of us who are completely undeserving of such blessings.

“Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is ^from above, coming down from ^the Father of lights, ^with whom there is no variation, or ^shifting shadow.” James 1:17

So, this Thanksgiving be thankful. Be thankful for your homes, your families, your friends, that groaning table of food, clean water to drink, a safe country to live in and those who defend your freedoms, your wealth that allows you to spend lavishly on Black Friday, and give credit where credit is due. To the God of all mercy and grace.

Happy Thanksgiving!

A Letter to My Children

Dear Laura, Nate and Daniel,

I know you’ve seen a lot of your friends parents breaking up lately. You three are not immune to the ugliness in this world. You live in a pastor’s home, and as much as we try to shield you from other’s problems, you still see quite a bit of it.  You, unfortunately know, at your young and tender ages, that Mommies and Daddies don’t always keep their promises. That Mommies and Daddies fight and scream and say and do horrible things to one another.

But, I want you to know beyond a shadow of a doubt there is a better way and that way will always be followed here in your home.

In our home Mom and Dad will not always agree, but we will always speak lovingly and respectfully to each other.

In our home Mom and Dad will take care of each other no matter what happens.

In our home Mom and Dad will support each other in the difficult times and cheer each other on when great things happen.

In our home Mom and Dad will put each other first, even before you. That means we will go on a date night every week and take vacations without you. That means Dad will kiss Mom every night first when he gets home before he greets you.

In our home Mom and Dad will show affection. Yeah, it might gross you out for awhile, but secretly we know you love it, because while you’re saying, “Ewwww,” we see you peeking and smiling.

In our home Mom and Dad will always be faithful to each other. There will never be another person that comes between Mom and Dad.

In our home Mom and Dad will never, never, never, never, NEVER use the word DIVORCE. Ever.

We will always love, always protect, always hope, always persevere, always keep our promises.

It’s not always easy, but we will do this with God’s strength and help. You can depend on that.

Love,

Mom

Personality in a Gingerbread House

We’re an intense home here at the Sahlberg’s.

Nathan’s a firstborn.

I’m a firstborn.

Laura’s a firstborn.

Yeah. That makes things interesting sometimes. When Nathan and I first interviewed with Village Missions 15 years ago, we had to take personality tests, and I so distinctly remember them looking at our papers, then at us and saying, “Do you guys realize you are completely incompatible on paper?!” Yeah, we realize that, but it works. We’re Spirit-controlled. But, we probably drive people nuts sometimes.

Yesterday, Laura went to an event with her homeschool group. They were building gingerbread houses. Now, for most people, gingerbread house building would be a fun, bonding, silly time. For a first-born, it’s a competition. It’s serious stuff folks, quit goofing around, OK!?

I came back to pick her up 5 hours later, and there were 13 houses sitting on the dining room table. 12 of the houses had globby icing and candy just haphazardly thrown on the houses.

Then there was one other house. This house had a perfectly little straight gumdrop sidewalk. It had completely perfect chocolate roof tiles. There was a candy cane front door a contractor would have been proud of.

Somehow, I just knew.

“Wow,” I said. “That’s quite a house!”

The moms all giggled.

“Oh, that’s Laura’s house.”

“Really!?” I exclaimed. “It is?”

“Yes,” answered my hostess. “I think she even used a level on the roof,” she teased.

Those of you who are first-borns will find nothing wrong with this story. You’ll think, “Well, duh. That’s how you should build a gingerbread house.” The rest of you may thing my kid should lighten up a little.

I seriously just had to laugh. Here’s Laura’s and my gingerbread house from two years ago:

She comes by it honestly, OK? My pantry is organized with everything in little baskets, neatly labeled according to type of food. Snacks, baking goods, canned goods, etc. My closet is arranged by type of clothes and then by color. What!? Doesn’t everyone do this? My mom alphabetizes her spices. Neither Nathan nor I can stand a cluttered house and within a day or so will send everyone on a mission to PICK UP and PUT AWAY!! I love Ikea and the Container Store.

We can’t help it. God made us this way, and there’s so many of us in this house. I’m just warning you. Be careful before you enter through our red front door. We might try to organize your life!

Baby Fix

I’m sure I’m not the only woman nearly past her child-bearing years who will admit to needing a baby fix now and then.

My kids are all getting so grown up, that sometimes I just miss that little, tiny, cuddly baby on my shoulder. Does anyone else out there miss that at all? When Daniel was old enough to go to school, I told Nathan he’d have to get me a baby or a puppy. He didn’t want a puppy, so we started to do foster care.

At first I went into foster care a little bit wanting to help and a lot wanting my baby fix. Those priorities soon changed. Foster care is hard, and that is a major understatement. It wrings you out emotionally and makes you want to quit. Yet once you’ve seen the hurt and pain and the sheer number of children in need, you simply can’t walk away.

I couldn’t anyway.

For instance, right now I have baby N. He’s 2 months old. I’d pay the county to take care of him! I’m definitely getting my baby fix. As I fed him in the middle of the night last night, I was so grieved over the fact that situations like this even exist. Baby N’s biological mother has NEVER fed her baby in the middle of the night. As much as we mothers become exhausted from those feedings, can you imagine never feeding your infant?

Other names and situations roll through my mind, that have left me forever changed.

Issa. N’soah. Jazzie. Ayden. Caleb. Rachael. Destiny.

A 5-week premature infant, deaf from fetal alcohol syndrome and coming down off meth who we had to rush to the hospital because she stopped breathing.

Another meth baby who died of SIDS 5 days after he left our home.

The little girl who became our daughter, only to be returned to her birth mom at the last minute.

Sometimes I think I may be crazy to keep doing this. It’s impossible not to fall in love a little bit with every single child you have. And it’s impossible not to have your heart broken every time they leave.

Bob Pierce, the founder of World Vision once famously said,

“Let my heart be broken with the things that break God's heart.”

We talk in our house about doing hard things. Just because something is hard to do, doesn’t mean it’s wrong. In fact, it’s probably the right thing to do. I have to trust that every time I have a little one here, whether it’s 3 days or 9 months, I am sharing a little bit of Jesus’ love with them and hoping to change their life in some small way.

I guess it’s less a baby fix for me and more of a baby fix for them. I can’t fix them permanently, only Jesus can. But, I can be a link in the chain that leads them to Him. Oh, how I pray for that.

Just Sayin’

I’ve noticed a new trend lately regarding words coming out of people’s mouths. Apparently it’s ok to trash someone or say whatever you feel like, even if it’s rude, inappropriate or hurtful as long as you follow it with the words, “Just sayin’.”

How do those two little words absolve the speaker of responsibility for their words? I’m wondering. I’ve heard it until I’m sick of it. On the radio, on the TV, in my church, aimed at me personally. Is this the Northern equivalent of the Southern “Bless her heart?”  Somehow these two meaningless words, “Just sayin’” have come to mean, “Hey, don’t hold me personally responsible for the junk spewing out of my mouth. I’m just saying what’s on my mind. It’s my right to speak my mind!”

There is a better way.  A way that, yes, requires some, GASP!, self-control, but also a way that preserves friendships and the dignity and preciousness of others.

“Let no ^unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for ^edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear.” Ephesians 4:29

When I was a teenager I got really mad at my sister one time and I yelled, “Shut up!” at her. Unfortunately, my mom heard me. She made me sit down and write this verse 100 times!!! Let’s just say it’s stuck in my head since that day.  Hateful words followed by, “just sayin’”, do not give grace to the hearer.

James had quite a bit to say about the tongue. In chapter 3, verses 8-10, he writes to Christians thus,

“But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of ^deadly poison. With it we bless ^our Lord and Father; and with it we curse men, ^who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.”

Those of us who claim Christ-likeness ought to speak words that are gracious and life-giving. We ought to build others up. We should seek to praise and encourage one another, not tear down. We need to stop gossip in its tracks.

In the words of Thumper from the movie "Bambi”, “If you don’t have nothin’ nice to say, don’t say nothin’ at all.”

Just sayin’

Salt and Light

We just passed a holiday that seems to get Christians in a tizzy. For some reason Halloween causes some Christians to get a little upset. Suddenly we hear buzz words like, “Satan’s Day” and “evil holiday.” These well-meaning people hide in their homes with their porch lights off or have alternate celebrations in their churches with their kids dressed up as Bible characters. To me, this all seems just a little bizarre. The last time I checked my Bible it still says, “Greater is He that is in YOU than He that is in THE WORLD!”

I’m especially puzzled by this behavior by my fellow pastors and missionaries. But regardless of our occupations, as Christians we have a mandate from Christ.

“You are the salt of the earth; but ^if the salt has become tasteless, how will it be made salty again? It is good for nothing anymore, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men. You are the light of the world. A city set on a ^hill cannot be hidden. ^Nor do men light a lamp, and put it under the peck-measure, but on the lampstand; and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may ^see your good works, and ^glorify your Father who is in heaven.” Matthew 5:13-16

Now obviously everyone has to follow his own conscience, so feel free to disagree, but ever since I was a little girl my parents have done a great job of having an open home, reaching out to their neighbors and engaging their culture without compromising their faith. I’ve trick or treated since I was a child. My parents have always known and reached out to the families and kids in any neighborhood we lived in. I also was fully aware that dressing up as anything that smacked of the occult was off limits; i.e. witches, devils, etc. As Nathan and I have begun to raise our family, we have done the same. We have taken our kids out trick or treating and handed out candy to scores of little dressed up kids. What a fabulous opportunity to visit with the families around us!

This year, our church sponsored a Trick-or-Treat Out-a-Reach in Gary/New Duluth, a community 3 miles from Fond du Lac, in a trailer park by the local elementary school. We set up a big tent in a central location, decorated it with lights, filled 250 bags with gobs of candy, juice boxes and a little card explaining why we were doing this. We had free hot chocolate for the chilly parents and we also visited with the parents while the kids got the candy to see if they were interested in a turkey dinner that our church would provide free of charge and deliver in time for Thanksgiving. Cost of all of this to the trick or treaters? Free. Expectations? None, no strings attached. Reason? Well, that question was clearly etched on many a face that night.

It was awesome to see parents eyes get bigger and bigger as their kids were handed an enormous bag of candy, and a bunch of glow sticks. Then another person would offer the parents hot chocolate. They were all cold, as the temperature hovered around freezing. Oh my, yes they wanted a hot drink and it was free!? And then when we offered the free meal? Only one person all night turned me down on that one.

So why did we do that? Well, basically what our little card said was this: We love Jesus, plain and simple. We seek to glorify him in all we say and do. Serving our community is one way to do that.

My kids came along, as did Pastor Bryan’s kids and also a few other families’ children. How wonderful for kids to learn at an early age to serve and give instead of get! On the way home Daniel, age 8 said, “Oh it was so hard to be around all that candy and give it all away and not have any!” But, he did! Without complaining, with a cheerful attitude. I was so proud of him! He learned to be unselfish and to do something difficult; to have the heart of a servant, of the Servant, who “came to serve and to give His life a ransom for many.”

We’re called to be salt and light. Food’s pretty bland without salt and people stumble around in darkness without a light. So, just think about it. How can you be salt and light to the world around you? Don’t hide your light; let it shine.