Alone – But Not Lonely

I just came off of a week-end spiritual retreat.  Our theme for the week-end was prayer and solitude.  The best part of the retreat was the two hours we had on Saturday afternoon to just be alone with God and our thoughts.  I sat on a quilt in the sun with just the breeze in the pines, the birds, my Bible and journal and God.  I found myself, surprisingly, not distracted at all, like I usually am at home.  There was nothing to be distracted by. I knew I had two hours of uninterrupted alone time, and I can’t remember the last time that happened. No phone was going to ring, no kids were going to demand my attention, no laundry or stove buzzers were going to go off.  My mind was just so relaxed.  I was able to talk to God, to be still and listen.  It was amazing and wonderful.

I came home to an empty house. Nathan and the kids had left for 8 days in the Boundary Waters.  Yeah, I know, most of you mothers are going Wow! Seriously? Eight days alone! What will you do? But, truly when you think about it, how many of us are comfortable being alone? Right now it’s Tuesday night and yes, I’m alone, but I’m not lonely. I know my family is . . .well, somewhere in Canada, and in God’s hands.  And I’m here, alone with my Savior. It’s a beautiful thing. To be able to be strong enough to be complete without another human being to complete you is an important place to reach in our growth.  I love my husband dearly. My children are the light of my life.  But, they don’t make me who I am, they don’t define me.  I am whole only in my relationship with Jesus Christ.  I’m here alone, but not alone.  Alone, but not lonely.

So, what WILL I do this week? Well . . .

-I’m going to do the laundry, and it will stay done!

-I’m going to clean the house, and it will stay clean!

-I’m going to sew.

-I already planted my garden (and boy do the back of legs hurt!)

-I’m going to read and veg out in front of some movies.

-I’m going for long walks everyday.

-I’m going out for lunch with a friend.

-I’m getting all of Laura’s grades into the computer (I’m going to do this daily, or at least weekly next year. I vow I will. Doing all her grades for a semester in one sitting is NOT fun!)

-I’m going to organize my music.

-I’m going to be available to help serve needs in the church if anyone needs me.

-I’m going to sleep in everyday!

-Turns out I’m dog sitting, a lady from church’s dog is living with me this week, and I’m taking care of the dogs that Laura normally takes care of, too.

I have lots to do and lots of time to spend talking to God and listening to God. Although I’m slightly concerned about the amount of words I’m NOT using during the day. I talked to the dog yesterday as if she could understand. Yeah. Good thing I’m having lunch with my friend tomorrow. I think I may need a little human contact this week.